Skip to content

When My Heart Softened

Facebook
Twitter
Email
LinkedIn

I joined usrah about four years ago.

Why did I join? Because I have always loved learning, and the thought of staying connected with God felt assuring and peaceful. So I joined. At first, I simply came and listened. My naqibah would teach, and I tried to follow. But honestly, after some time, I didn’t really enjoy it. I didn’t feel connected.

So eventually, I stopped trying so hard — but I didn’t leave. I knew that if I walked away, some part of me would drown. Just as emotions need support, iman does too. And deep inside, something kept telling me to stay, even when I didn’t know why.

Maybe that was Allah’s guidance.

So I kept joining the sessions quietly, simply being there — not because I was the most consistent, but because something in me knew it was good for me, even when I didn’t fully understand how.

For a long time, I didn’t see myself as someone who could contribute to the ummah. I thought dakwah was only for those who were already deeply religious — the ones with calm voices and pure hearts.

I wasn’t like that.

I had my own hobbies, my own world — things like aerial and yoga that felt so far from “religious.” But one day, something changed. I can’t even say exactly when. It wasn’t a big or dramatic moment, more like a quiet realization that I wanted to contribute.

I began to understand that being part of dakwah isn’t about being perfect. It’s about caring. I also wanted to break the stereotype that only “pious-looking” people belong in usrah.

It isn’t true. Usrah isn’t a club for perfect Muslims.

It is nourishment for your soul. It’s where your heart learns, even when your mind is still trying to understand. 

Allah says in the Qur’an: “Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.” (Surah Ar-Ra’d, 13:28)

Since then, my heart has felt softer. I can’t fully explain it.

It is as if Allah planted something small inside me that keeps growing — slowly and quietly.

I am still me. I still love aerial and yoga. But maybe now, I just see them differently — as parts of me that can coexist with faith, not compete with it.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.